Batman's Perfection - Divine perception

My life is becoming perfection... such a divine perception.

I look around my room and it's clean, clear, neat and tidy. Despite the many tasks, demands, busy and huge obligations and responsibilities, my life is being held together. By some divine glue, my life has become spiritualized. It's perfect despite that I want to say otherwise. I am here tonight to honor myself and my process and to talk about my goals and ideals. To gain clarity for myself. I never thought that I could feel this successful inwardly. I am regaining a sense of what success truly is. It doesn't matter if every single person on Earth thinks I am a success, unless I feel it. What I feel is success, only I can measure. A lot my feeling of success comes from wanting to feel and be in tune with my life purpose, with being myself. Being who I truly am and acting despite the fear is truly being successful in my eyes.

Last night I went to watch the new Batman movie, The Dark Knight Rises. In the movie I saw many parallels to my own life. Bruce Wayne, after being defeated and painfully humiliated, goes into hiding for 7 years. In this time he trains, he faces fears and builds his strength. He returns to the city, to face his past and to try out his new strength. He is met with breakthroughs, breakdowns, success and major failures. Once again, a broken man, he gives up and lets everything go, after he loses everything externally. Including the people he loved the most. Again, he is paralyzed by the pain that life has brought him and unable to cope with moving on. His past leaves him shattered and literally, crippled. Finally, he comes head to head with his past and his greatest fears and foes. He gets beat, bad, really bad and is given the choice of giving up completely, death. I don't wanna ruin the ending for you guys but I want to let you know, I know how this guy feels.

From the age of 21 to 28, seven years, I started to intensely meditate and heal from the trauma and painful experiences of childhood and adolescence. Some of these painful experiences were self inflicted and others were things that needed I needed to bring forgiveness to. After seven years of healing, I am coming to the point where moving forward and standing up is presenting itself once again. I am re-gaining strength and momentum and in that, the fear is definitely presenting itself. The past pain is surfacing and taunting me with failure being hung over my head. But I am not the same person, I am stronger, I have grown and changed and learnt. I will not make the same mistakes. I am smart and intuitive. Just because I grew up poor doesn't mean I am destined to relive the experiences that were there to present to me the lessons I needed to learn. Honesty, struggle, strength, perseverance, hard work, focus, gratitude, sharing, kindness, understanding, patience, spirituality. I will not allow the past to haunt me any longer, I will move forward. I have a mission and I know I have all the tools for success, I feel it in my bones and my blood. I am alive and well.


Sometimes I look at people who I see have been crippled, physically by life. I feel like "wow, they are doing so much even though they are crippled." What excuse do I have? Why am I here still talking about this? I am shifting, the world is shifting and everything around me seems to be falling perfectly into place. I must say that relaxing, into myself and life feels to make things a lot easier. Listening to the small but clear voice within is the biggest thing I have learnt in the last ten years of yoga and meditation. That voice has taken me this far and brought me the most beautiful gifts that life has to offer, inside and out. 


I am definitely re-inspired by life and the movie I saw last night. Although I believe the messages are always there wherever we are willing, open and receptive. Although Batman was incredibly violent and somewhat disturbing there were some jewels it had to offer... besides Christian Bale's hard pecs. 


Ommmm