From Yogini to Bramacharini to Dakini and back to Yogini Again

For those of you who have been following my blog for the past 4 years since it started, I feel the need to comment on my new lifestyle change. 

How did yogini gone bramacharini end up turning Dakini and wind up living in the city of Manila, engaged?

Well the first question is why does anything come about in life? 

“I will reason, will, and  I will act but guide thou my reason, will, activity to the right thing I should do” – Paramhansa Yogananda. This mantra or affirmation has been a guiding post for me over the past years. 

I went through some intense times over the past few years. For those of you who know me know that the experience level has been all over the gamut. From living as a bramacharini in a mansion LA to serving at a small countryside ashram in the countryside of Oregon. The common denominator in everything I did over the past 3 or so years has all been a dedication to truth. Truth seeking, seeking myself and asking what am I and what am I not. Did I find it? 

Certainly.

When I first met my friend Ben at the SRF chapel in Vancouver, I introduced myself to him saying that I was a “bramacharini in the city”. He replied to me without missing a beat “more like Tantric Dakini with Sidhis”. Hmmm, well….. haha.  

It’s been almost two years now since I became a bramacharini (literally “one who walks with Brahma”) or woman yogi renunciate who takes God as one’s partner, keeping celibacy. My two year vow has completed this October. For awhile I was battling back in forth with the feeling of safety being alone brings. God is the safest partner you’ll ever have. But opening my heart to someone else, wow, that can be scary… and powerful. 

 All the armor melts away when you fall in love. The edges get soft and women, well we become soft.  Over time, all the beautiful and not so beautiful things start to be revealed, as petal by petal, the center is reached. It’s a very delicate process and the heart cannot be rushed. It has been hurt many times, for all of us. I think we forget, we think that only we have pain. My pain. We forget about their pain, our pain, his/her pain. 

For months I struggled with the dilemma of whether I wanted to remain a bramacharini or continue on as before as a yogini, taking a partner or a Dakini, one who follows the tantric path - embracing life and all it has to offer, making this the sadhana (practice). The art of embracing vs that of renouncing, both important on my spiritual path. What a powerful practice after denying and renouncing so much for so many years. Embracing life and all it brings and offers generously to me. I suppose there are many aspects of the goddess that are one and simultaneously all of these aspects. 

Truthfulness, Honesty and Integrity,  are words I saw written on the walls of Swamiji’s (Swami Kriyananda’s) apartment.

It’s important not to get fooled by our own mind. It will trick you into all kinds of falsehoods. Such as the big one: you will be happier when you have someone else, get somewhere else, have something else. It got me a lot over the three years I was alone. But, I knew until I conquered that desire and could actually just feel myself and be happy, that nothing, no one could complete that aspect of myself. Oh yes, when I have the perfect man it will complete my dream to have a house, child, career etc. How can this be? Impossible. I mean, these things certainly will come and they are blessings undoubtedly, but to wait unhappily or longingly until that day, is to look past the gift this moment has to bring. YOU with yourself. You are your best friend. I love myself as my best friend, sometimes I forget, but it’s truly a blessing when I am reminded or remember. Giving to yourself is one big aspect of what friends do for one another. Time, energy, money, doing things you love, with yourself, first.

Now, I have an outer best friend too, Janaka. Now that I know how to love, which came from learning to love me first. So, there is no  other way to say it but that I moved back to the Philippines. My partner, Johan (also known as Janaka) was my love before I took my formal renunciation vows, which he supported me through, And when I was done, he was still there by Guru’s grace. There is a special prayer that Yogananda suggests to pray if one is asking for your life partner. I can say it works. So, not to the day, but pretty close, as I was finishing my vows, my partner Johan surfaced I joke with him about living in the Philippines because I say, “you couldn’t have been closer huh” but I’m also grateful he’s not from a cold country like Bulgaria or something. You take what you get and you take what the Guru offers. I am grateful.

What to say about the Philippines.                                                                                  

It’s an adjustment. How to complain. You really can’t. It's beautiful here. I am in the city for now but I have lots of good things to say about that too. I have this beautiful blue topaz ring on my finger and I think, how did I wind up living here with my soul partner after undergoing so much tapasya (hard work) over the last few years. There is lots that is different here such as we have someone who helps prepares three meals a day, there is someone to wash the cloths, do errands and even drive should we need this. ?? In America you have to be quite wealthy to afford these kinds of full time services but here helpers are common. They are wonderful and I appreciate them greatly but it is hard sometimes to not have to care for these basic everyday things. But in a sense, I am also learning a lesson in receiving. Janaka is wonderful and accommodative and has helped me greatly to get adapted here.

Will I continue my blog. I don’t know. I’ve thought about giving it up. Maybe it has served its purposeEverything has it’s time and maybe Yoga Girl East West is ripe. The question now is, when will the movie come out?

Let's Soak it up - Water Meditation/Blessing

 The water. Has been a big subject around my circles in Vancouver.
What is happening with our water. It's being polluted, diluted, ionized, purified, de-mineralized and flouridized.
But more recently it's a spill from the toxic run-off from a mining site in Northern BC
which is headed for the rivers of Vancouver via the Fraser.

I wanted to talk about an experience I had the other day while walking by the river in Richmond
at the Dykes where the ocean water and Fraser meet.

I was walking down the path doing my usual morning walk when I saw a little trail that led off the path and it caught my attention. Feeling particularly open to explore and not being in a time crunch I followed it off the beaten path to a beautiful, open, expansive place that overlooked the ocean in the far distance. To my immediate view I could not see the river flowing ahead of me but as I continued to walk it came into my view. Ah, this is why I am here I felt it instantaneously.
It was beautiful and I sat down beside the water thinking that one day my children would also want to swim and play in this same water. How inviting the water looked and I imagined what it would be like if all waters were clean and we didn't have to worry about getting into them.
I noticed a sludgy substance on the surface of the water and also something that appeared shiny such as oil.

I began to pray for the water and the mantra "Gayatri" began to emerge from my lips.  I sang it over and over again, praying for the water in the best way I knew how and I felt the energy and blessing emerging. After I stopped, I stood up feeling so refreshed and cleansed. I felt the compelling urge, or call to enter the water. I felt several things, first being that my body as a channel would bless this water, no matter how polluted. Second, that I would also be purified by this water and the strong intention. I have heard it said that the Ganga (Ganges) river in India is said to be extremely polluted but daily people enter it and even drink the water. I have heard this water not only feels pure and clean when entering it but has also blessed all those who enter it. So anyways, I had this similar experience.
Upon entering the sludgy water I kept my mind and intention focused even though the sliminess made me want to cringe a little. I prayed and kept my consciousness uplifted as I let my naked body resonate in the water. After I got out, I felt amazingly cleansed and refreshed by the whole experience. Going from a place of wondering how I could help the rivers to this experience made me feel that we each have a part to play. Maybe driving up to Likely, BC was not my way to assist the cause this time around. Just being present was all it took for me to play a small role in the efforts to help our waterways which are so precious to all of us. I want my children to be able to play in safe, clean waters and not have to worry that there is none left when they are my age. So this is the start.

Jai Ma

Astral Medicine - 9 Card Art Deck

"Astral Medicine" Set of 9 Spiritual Art Cards - $40

                                    Original Artwork by Clarity West & by Bhaki Ruggiero
                                           (Shipping to US & Canada Included in price)

   

                               

Native American influence on the Land and Our Lives

I can't help but notice the small pink teepee resurrected in my parent's kitchen and wonder at the Aboriginal influence that permeates the lives of us all here in BC, maybe in all of North America.

How did I, a white girl of French descent start sweating at a Native American sweat lodge at the age of 23? And eventually end up taking part in the Sun Dance ceremony for four years at the Lakota Sioux reserve in Middle America?
Well I must digress into some history first to answer those questions.

There is a tribe of people living here in the North West Coast that I have had the pleasure of encountering over the last few months. This mixed tribe of people or "Rainbow tribe" as we are calling it is of every color, nationality, creed and belief. I love these people and they are some of the most tuned in, caring and active people I have encountered. They care about life, about Earth, about making a difference and they aren't afraid to share it. These are my people, they are my tribe. We are sometimes referred to as the Water Tribe. No matter how many beliefs, the underlying tie or connection: the Native American ways seem to influence and underlie all of our values or practices. Tibetan, yogic, Christian. I have been meeting many of these mixed breeds lately and I firmly believe that the Native American spirituality, heritage, way of life is embedded into the land.

I was introduced to the Native ways first through a Classic book called Black Elk Speaks. The book is a first person account from an Oglala Lakota Sioux, Holy man known by the name Black Elk. The book documents the first interactions between the Native peoples and wasichus or white soldiers when they first began to colonize the US and Canada. It is shocking to hear the stories of the famous battles such as Wounded Knee and Little Big Horn. Now memorial sites to these famous massacres, I went to visit this summer for the first time. You could feel the energy permeated in the land, it was a bit chilling to look around and see the hundreds of little crosses sticking up out of the ground. These battles were some of the first interaction between the native people of this land and the people who were coming to settle here. For a long time I was caught up in the horror and the sadness of these stories as it felt as if it had happened to me and maybe in a way, it had happened to all of us.

Shortly after reading the book Black Elk and hearing those words "Lakota Sioux" echo through my brain day and night, a very interesting young man showed up at my work one day. He was wearing a big necklace made of Eagle claws and thick turquoise beads and he was Indian. We very fast became friends and I started to teach him Photoshop and the world of Design and he taught me about the Native ways he had been raised in. I went to my first sweat lodge in Washington and I was hooked.


I say I've died 3 times in this lifetime already. One was at the Sundance the first year I went, shortly after the sweat lodge experience. The second was in the one Ayahusca ceremony I took part in. And the third was this summer in Salt Spring Island on the healing table of a Powerful healer. RIP.

But what really intrigued me about the Native ways was the connection with the Earth and the groundedness of it all. Coming from a flighty North American family there was so much disconnect from life, from real life. It was all about rushing around, money and madness, everything but the important things, what felt to me.

I fell in love with how the Native ways focused on the family as the center of life and the connection with all life. It drew me in. I fell in love with the ways. I felt a connection with my spirit and felt how I had a connection with life. I experienced deep awakening and connection that I had not experienced ever.

I ended up getting sobriety from my weekly attendance at the sweat lodge which went on for months and then years. Being sober meant a lot to me coming from a strong addiction to alcohol from the age of 13. By 24 I was virtually sober. A great feeling for me at that age.



Why do I talk about all these things now? Well it is surfacing strong in my life and my path as I question the last 6 years of my life and interconnectedness with the Native ways.

With my connection to this land in BC, where I was born there is a strong bond which continuously seems to present itself no matter where I go or for how long. This time the call came from the Likely mining spill that has infiltrated the rivers and certain lakes in Northern BC. One that houses close to 1/4 of the Salmon population. Now all this sludge which seeped out from a mining tailings pond is headed straight down the Fraser River to Vancouver.

I felt a call to attend a meeting with friends of the "rainbow tribe" which discussed solutions for these amazing disasters that are happening to Mother Earth right now, particularly the waters, oceans, rivers. The conclusion was that if the water is sick, we are sick. If she is being poisoned, it's all of us, not just "them". It also greatly affects the Coastal Native people's drinking water. We all have to take responsibility and stand up, even if it's just spreading the awareness.

I don't know what the connection is here with the Native people and the land but it's permeated in many of us and touches somewhere deep.



I guess what my question is is whether we are Hindus, Buddhists, Jews or spiritualists on this land, do we all have a Native connection? If we are tuned in, or not. Maybe we were Natives Americans once or maybe the spirit of the land and it's people are permeated here for all time.

The Native peoples are rising up much stronger these days especially with all the action needed to protect and ensure the right treatment of the land. I heard said that the Natives are the stewards of the land for this planet. The white man, the steward of the fire. The Asians, stewards of the air element and the black people, the water. Who knows.

This was a longer post than I had intended but I cared to explore these thoughts and I ask you to do the same. If you are from BC and care to comment or post about this or anything happening right now with the water, please do so or msg me. I would love to hear your thoughts on this subject.

Much love and gratitude.

love,
Clarity

Yoga Fest - Art for India Project

Two girls in India, achieving their dreams of creating art, doing yoga and volunteering with children.


Anandamayi Ma, a well known woman saint from India was famous for her Kheyal, the divine inner prompting that shaped all her movements and activities. Ma was famous for her intuition that would sometimes carry her suddenly deep in the night, hundreds of miles away, only to answer the inner call of one lonely devotee who cried deep enough for her. This divine intuition was so mystical that Ma sometimes appeared crazy or reckless to those who did not understand her inner promptings. This call carried her along the sacred path she walked helping many to attune themselves to God and to a deeper understanding of themselves. Ma’s legacy continues on...

Clarity West
  Over the past four years, I have been on an intense spiritual quest which started in 2009 when I gave up everything and traveled around the US. I wanted truth and I knew that I needed to find the people who had it.

I ended up interviewing several teachers and enlightened beings around the Globe including Swami Kriyananda, Brooke Medicine Eagle, Pi Villaraza, Dr Peter Van Houten and Sunny Baba among other world proponents on spirituality around the US and Asia. Now that my 4 year journey is complete, I am sharing the wisdom, strength and skills I have learned. 

This is expressing itself in several ways including working with children, painting and exploring my journey through the documentary film I created over the course of my travels.  You can view the trailer online.

I am interested in an alternative Education system called  EFL (Education for Life) which is a well-rounded view on childhood development discovered by J. Donald Walters (Swami Kriyananda). It is a similar system to the gurukul, which is the ancient Indian system of schooling which focuses on the child as the whole being; body, mind and soul. It inspired me deeply and I began to develop my gifts and talents in art and creativity not only for myself but also to share with children. India has some of the greatest wealth when it comes to knowledge but unfortunately the education system is depleted or in many areas, non-existent. This does not give children much chance to become more than simple laborers. We can only do our part, which is to start with one or two schools.

“I slept and I dreamed that life is all joy. I woke and I saw that life is all service. I served and I saw that service is joy.” ― Khalil Gibran

What we are doing
We have the opportunity to go to India and teach at a small school after being invited by a woman named Vanamali Devi who has an ashram near Rishikesh. After speaking to a friend, Bhakti Ruggiero another Education for Life (pre-school) teacher, the whole journey started to unfold.

We would like to go to the school near Rishikesh to volunteer as well as visit the Mother Miracle School. We have been invited to give presentations on EFL in South India for parents, teachers and children. The journey will be approx 6months leaving fall 2014, God willing and dependent on your support.

There are many social areas in India that are in need of assistance, Education for children is one of the biggest. In our small way, Bhakti and Clarity will make an impact in the lives of the children whom we meet.

Our Offering

In exchange (for your offering), Bhakti and her friend Clarity West are creating original photographic, painting and mixed media pieces for you and your involvement in the project.

Clarity West is a trained graphic artist, painter, designer and filmmaker. She creates original pieces, mixing bright colors & spiritual imagery to create modern, uplifting pieces of art on canvas, paper or wood board.     

http://claritycreative.blogspot.ca

Art speaks to us an intuitive and almost mystical level and when it is channeled from a higher source can offer much upliftment and inspiration. I like to use colors and images that uplift and inspire. If we are going to have imagery up on our walls why not have beautiful uplifting colors and imagery that resonates with who we are and makes us feel naturally good.

You can view many pieces through my Art Blog: http://claritycreative.blogspot.ca/

or through my Facebook page.

We are offering the following:

• Art Prints
• Giclee; high quality canvas prints, stretched, ready to hang - delivered
• Original paintings 
• Commissions- You choose what you would like me to paint. 
• Original artworks which I will create in India and with the children
  

  Breakdown of Costs Raised with Indiegogo (Covered) 1000 Misc Expenses; Travel Insurance, Remedies, etc. 500 Home Expenses (while in India) 500 India Travel Expenses 1000 Air Fare to India (for two) 3000 Food, lodging 6000 Total Needed 11,000
  The Impact   The impact of this project is a win-win-win situation. The girls putting on this project will be given the chance to express the deep love and concern they have for children in India and assist kids in expressing themselves through music, yoga and art.  The participants in this project will receive beautiful art work and other gifts (see below) and a part in a truly dynamic vision that has been held for some time. The girls creating this project will actualize their goals and be able to fulfill a life long desire to return to India where the history and lineage of their life teachings were founded.

  Gifts

$5 USD- Namaste 
We will chant Om at the Ganga for you.

$20 USD
Memorable Gift from India. 
We'll bring you back something niiice.
 

$30 USD
Child's Play. 
We'll send you a child's painting from one of the school's we visit in India.

$45 USD
Art Deco. Set of 9 Art Postcards
Fine Art Original Designs by Clarity West & Bhakti Ruggiero. 
Shipping included

$60 USD 
Ready to Print Yoga. High res Digital File - Ready to print.  
Choice of Images - Original Artwork by 
Clarity West & Bhakti Ruggiero. 

$85
Om Beauty in Color 
8x8 Framed Print in 8x10 Frame. Your choice of Art. 
Delivery Included
                                                                 

$125
Om Beauty in Color 
12x12 Giclee Fine Art Print. Signed
Delivery Included

$175
Bhakti Marg
18x24 Matted Giclee or Canvas Print
High Quality Archival Materials
Your choice of image or Clarity West & Bhakti Ruggiero Art Works
Delivery Included
(Framing Optional)

$275
Saints
Original Painting completed in India or 
current relevant work-20x24-Giclee on Canvas or Wood

 $325
Om Namah Shivaya
Astrology reading with World Class Vedic Astrologer,
Drupada Macdonald. Have a chart made that will outline your life path. 
1.5hr Session on the phone. Includes recording
 

 $475
Ma
Original Painting Ma (Anandamoyi Ma)
Acrylic Paint w Mixed Media
18x24 or  2 - 8 x 10  set ???
 

 $680
India Express
Mixed Media on Canvas - Saint or Personage (of your choice) 
with original painting by Clarity West, Bhakti Ruggieor and Kids in India. 
24x30
Delivery

 $1000
Mahatma Ghandiji
Large Scale Original Painting - 30x40 
Collage of your favorite Saints/persons with original painting 
by Clarity West - Delivery

 

$3500
One week (7 day) All Inclusive Stay
World renowned Yoga Retreat Center
The Expanding Light at Ananda Village,
Northern California.
Meals, Accommodations and Yoga Classes 
Personal Retreat - Any Season
 

  
Feature

$100 Kashiraja - 

Over the phone personal astrology reading 

with Vedic Astrologer and author of "Astrology of a Yogi" - Massimo Kashiraja

It is a blessing to offer our service and go deeper into our own practices as well, both inevitably help others to do the same. 

Blessings for your offering and supporting the inspiration that dreams become a reality when we put energy behind them.

Many Blessings to you, :)



                   Bhakti Ruggiero & Clarity West