Ultimate Surrender

Below is e-mail corespondance between me and Tom, a spiritual adviser/healer/modern day shaman friend of mine.  Thought it may help.

 

Hi Tom 

 

Is it just me but I seem to be getting very confused lately with making decisions.
So many people are telling me so many different things, makes me wonder,
who is creator telling me something and who is just testing me or sharing their own opinion??
'
I have been going back and forth for a month deciding whether or not to go to South Dakota and Sundance.
Then I started to feel, maybe I could dance at Ma-I, alone, just creator and I.
and have support from friends here.
But then, I am discouraged from a very close friend of mine, who is native and also a Sundancer.
People are telling me to be realistic, but for me, I'm not even sure what realistic is anymore, aren't all things possible.
What is right or wrong?

I asked my guides, should I go. They told me "you don't have to, but you can". I felt this was clear, but also unclear. Haha

Is this issue to do with my personal power?
I feel there is going to come a big lesson of all this back and forth.
Needing more clarity.

Much love to you,

Clarity

 

 

 

Dear Clarity,
Welcome to the world of the uncertain!

 

Part of the game of being human is experiencing constant uncertainty, and learning to live comfortably with that. The spirits respect our journey into separation and limit their interference. The answer you got when you prayed about going to S. Dakota is perfect... "you don't have to go, but you can." This is how much of my answers come. What they are saying very clearly is... "going if fine, not going is fine, there is no right answer."
You are also correct in your idea to stay in Maia since that exploration could lead to a process we could use there for other people who are extreme in their soul searching. Keep in mind that all this searching can be such a coverup, a tranquilizer to keep you from just being where you are, feeling what you are feeling, and accepting the human condition you call Clarity.
Guru's, teachers, saints, mystics can be just as trapped in the illusion of this world as anyone else, just at another level.

There is no ultimate "Truth" just perspectives that can be very contradictive and confusing. If you decide to go to S. Dakota, do it because you enjoy it, and not to find something you think is missing in you. If you change in some measurable way, it is probably only a change in perspectives, not some profound awakening to an ultimate truth that doesn't exist... "from my perspective."
Keeping looking at yourself, not from judgment but to expand your self awareness. It is not the answers, but the questions that open us up for a better look. I believe we are here in the human condition to experience the uncertainty, the fear, pain, betrayal, longing, confusion, worry and peace, bliss, happiness, passion, pleasure and many other things. What are we all running away from, or looking for?  We came here to for THIS!
Our addictive personalities and social conditioning has people looking for the good and the pleasant, while avoiding the bad and unpleasant.
Resisting what IS, is where all the pain comes from. Consider an "Unconditional Surrender" to what IS. That is the moment of power and awareness.
Hold this and everything else... LIGHTLY!

LOVES
Picture attached that I did a few years ago. "The journey is the destination"

PS... Thank you for your honesty and vulnerability. You are reminding me what I went through and what I have learned. What I say to you, I am only reminding myself of.