Giving back

I decided today that because there are so many things I need, that I'm going to give back.
I have been waking up the past few mornings kind of overwhelmed with how I will get this film done,
move to community, feed myself, clothe myself, etc. Life. Right?
Asking for help feels like pulling teeth, it's painful, I don't want to do it.
I have bills, that is just a fact. How will I pay them? That is the question.

So I decided today, since I was so overwhelmed with what I needed for myself I would just give instead.
Without anyone asking me.

So I came over to my aunt's house this afternoon and I gave her a crystal healing. She was very grateful. I went deep into the energy flow, the heart energy is always then when I am willing to stop and take a step back from "the routine". Life is an amazing thing, every single day. But when we are in the trap of survival, it doesn't feel exciting everyday. All it takes to shift that energy is the willingness to stop, take a breath and become present. Just the willingness. It's always just waiting there for us.

I have one week until I am leaving and I will offer myself to do God's healing work for someone who needs it everyday this week. I have so many things to do but I feel tired of making things happen for myself. I am offering myself in service now and then it will give me the faith that God will also help me. Kat is booked for Monday, today I did my first one for the week. We will see what happens for me when I ask, how may I serve you, rather than, I need. The balance is needed, the giving and the receiving, but I figure if both are lacking right now, I will start with the giving.